On Mindfulness- Based Stress Reduction, Dumb Things My Brain Tells Me

 The entire reason I took the online Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction class in March was that I’ve known since January  I would need to have a surveillance CT scan before April 6th. The MBSR class was another tool I was pretty desperate to add to my mental health toolbox.   And as I have writing about previously, these measures have actually been helpful, which is fantastic because CBD oil and THC doesn’t work for me—a bummer since here in Illinois pot is legal and I would definitely get some cannabis gummies if they would reduce my anxiety. 

There are four days until the scan and currently, I rate my scanxiety as a 5 on a scale of 1-10. The kicker is that it’s not the actual scan that completely melts my brain, it's the time between when the scan is done and when I hear the results. Ack, just typing that sentence moves me up to a 6 of 10.  

The scanxiety will really ramp up on the night before the scan and the day of the scan, then once the scan is over it will drop. The worse time will be during business hours after the scan. At any moment my phone might show the doctor’s number as an incoming call and I won’t be able to hardly breath. Fun fact, since I won that Fitbit from the library, this time I will be able to see exactly how much my blood pressure spikes before the scan and when I get the results. 

As I was writing this post, I found my brain created a new trick to slip past some of my new coping mechanisms. Now my brain is telling me, I should be worried about the scan, because maybe worrying about it is what will make me have good results. In other words, I need to mentally suffer in order to earn a clean scan. How bonkers is that! I mean, top-notch terrible rationalizations there from my brain. So I am noticing this thought and I am allowing it to float on by as I remind myself:

Thoughts are not facts. Say it again: Thoughts are not facts.

Can Netflix Make This Book into A Movie? #RomanceReview #HowToCatchaQueen 4.5 Stars

 

I decided to read this book because I enjoyed Alyssa Cole's mystery thriller When No One is Watching. As you can probably tell from the cover this book is a romance.  This is the first book in a new series by Alyssa Cole called Runaway Royals. 

While this book is contemporary, the book takes place in a country where there is an absolute monarchy, so you have some elements that are usually found in a Historical Romance.  The couple in the book Shanti and Sanyu are in an arranged marriage that includes a four-month trial.  King Sanyu is contending with grief over the loss of his father as well as crippling anxiety.  Shanti has focused her whole life on becoming a Queen in order to live a life of service and King Sanyu has spent his whole life trying to avoid the crown. 

This book is a slow burn, but also has the added tension of the marriage trial period.  In addition to reading to find out how and when they will fall in love and make a commitment, we also read to see how this couple will be able to pull the Kingdom out of its downward spiral and bring it into the global community.  I enjoyed the political discussions in the book as well as learning about the mythology of the Kingdom.  Alyssa Cole does an excellent job of discussing mental health as we see Shanti teach Sanyu coping mechanisms, and also as King Sanyu realizes there is no shame in therapy.   

Throughout the book Alyssa Cole puts in some laugh-out-loud lines which are so fun to read, and also there are some quiet lines that really resonate with the reader, such as the one below:

This is a smart romance and interwoven with romance and great sex, we see characters learning their worth and respecting the worth of others.   4.5 stars! 

If you read this book, let me know what you think!

Today is National Carrot Cake Day- I like to eat Carrot Cake, but I can't say I've ever made it!  If you'd like to give it a go today here is a recipe: Carrot Cake Recipe With Video

Happy Wednesday! 

Can I Speak to The Manager?

This is not the 2020 I ordered. I would like to return it and get a new virus-free version.

How are you doing?  I'm hanging in there. I'm at home this week and frankly, I'd really rather be at work, how about you?  While I currently have all the time in the day to read books, write and listen to podcasts, I'm having trouble focusing to do any of that.

I don't know if I am feeling more general anxiety because I spent the last nine months or so undergoing cancer treatments and now I'm feeling some PTSD or if I would have this same level of anxiety either way. I feel like my stress is higher than it would be if not for my cancer season.  Just a few weeks ago I was enjoying a comfort that had come from making peace with my 'new post-cancer normal'  and now here we are.

 Now suddenly we are living in a time for everyone everywhere to struggle with uncertainty everywhere. Will we have jobs? Will the kids go back to school?  and most importantly, Will I get sick? Will they get sick? How sick? And this one for me personally, is it possible when we were all sick in February that we already had COVID-19?  Will we ever know? How long does this go on?

A bunch of questions and no solid answers. This is why I've been busying myself with cleaning out cabinets and drawers as well as cooking. These are things I can control.  I am actually running out of nooks and crannies to clean. I'm on the brink of ordering paint to paint our bedroom. I should not do this. I'm not good at painting and it makes me cranky.   Today I am pledging to myself to stay away from any press conferences on my TV and to use my time to escape into an urban fantasy book.  If you can, I suggest doing the same.  If you are working please wash your hands as much as you can!

Yesterday, I wanted to use up leftover noodles and it was definitely time for comfort food so I tried to recreate a breakfast my Oma would make.   1. Cut up some thick-cut bacon and fry it in a pan. 2. Take out the bacon and fry a chopped onion in the pan for a couple minutes. 3. Add in leftover baked potatoes that you have cut up.  4. Stir for a couple minutes adding salt, pepper, and some thyme to taste. 5. Take your leftover noodles and toss those with breadcrumbs you have from stale bread. 6. put the noodles in the pan along with the bacon and cook it all together for about 4 minutes.  Then serve.

I used turkey bacon and added in some chopped yellow bell pepper I had leftover from the day before.  I made an egg over easy to top my noodle dish. I used a little oil in my skillet because I didn't have delicious bacon grease.

My Oma's was obviously better than my re-creation. But I will say this dish is a hearty breakfast and a good way to use leftovers!

Stay Healthy. Stay at home!